So never in my wildest dreams did I expect this to happen. We went to get the mail yesterday and there were a few small packages in it, one for each of the kids and myself. From E. Not gonna lie at first I was like wtf? For a quick instant I was like is … Continue reading I Know You’re Built To Love, But Broken Now, So Just Try, Yeah I know You’re Chokin’ On Your Fears
Last night Z nearly broke my heart. I was washing her hair, which could be considered a full time job, although we do it on average once a week if I've had enough coffee and sleep, when she made the comment that she doesn't like her hair and wished it was like all her friends … Continue reading I Wish I Could Be Every Little Thing You Wanted All The Time
So today I teared up when I went for a pedicure. All because the guy doing my toes took off his gloves near the end and touched my feet with bare hands. It was the first skin to skin touch I've had in months and it almost made me cry. It's beautiful here. Sunny and … Continue reading Pull Me In, Hold Me Tight, Don’t Let Go / I Want To Step Into Your Great Unknown With You And Me Setting The Tone
My Grandpa has been calling. I haven't answer the phone because, well because I didn't want to talk to him. He first left a voicemail maybe 2 weeks ago now. But this morning when my phone rang, I didn't recognize the number so I picked up. Turns out, he had got in touch with his … Continue reading I Got Just One Life In A World That Keeps On Pushin’ Me Around But I’ll Stand My Ground
So thanks to E constantly delaying the divorce, today is officially my eight year wedding anniversary. And I've spent 3.5 of those years trying to put E in my past. It's a work in progress. August 7th, 2009. The seventh day, of the eighth month, of the ninth year. E didn't care when we got … Continue reading I Never Lose Nothing But Damn I Done Had It I Ain’t Never Strike Out They Can’t Average What I Batted No
With Little E's birthday yesterday and Z's coming up next week, it's really been hitting a chord I didn't even know I had. I want another baby. My kids are growing up and soon I'll have a 4 & 7-year-old in my house and I won't even be able to pretend I have a toddler … Continue reading I’ll Take A Breath, I’ll Take Her By My Side We Stand In Awe, We’ve Created Life
Today is Little E's 7th birthday. And I have so many things I've been wanting to post about, but decided to write about the day he was born. Because that's a story of its own! My pregnancy with Little E went great. Absolutely no morning sickness, none of the uncomfortable sleeping at night, just a … Continue reading Happy Birthday To You Happy Birthday Dear Little E, Happy Birthday To You.
As we were preparing to get married, E shared a "tradition" from back home that he wanted us to partake in. This might be difficult to explain as it's regarding names and I try to avoid using real name here for anonymity sake, as well as the fact that the "tradition" turned out to be … Continue reading Wake Me Up When It’s All Over. When I’m Wiser And I’m Older.
So I've been in and out of touch with K since he first got re-arrested. I'm sorry I don't remember where I left off with this story so if I repeat myself or miss a whole chunk (hopefully not) please forgive me. The last time I heard from him was Monday when he called again … Continue reading Am I Out Of My Mind? If You Only Knew The Bad Things I Like Don’t Think That I Can Explain It. What Can I Say, It’s Complicated
After W was killed, months had passed since the funeral and I had had multiple conversations with myself about "moving on". One week I particular I found my thoughts constantly dwelling on things like 'was I ready', and if I was how would I even meet someone new?!? I no longer went to the club/pub/bars, … Continue reading Love In A Thousand Different Flavours I Wish That I Could Taste Them All Tonight No, I Ain’t Got No Dinner Plans