equality – How I Lost My Chains

Black. White. Yellow. Brown. Mixed and the list goes on.

My co-worker and I just spent 15 minutes chatting about if these terms should ever be used to describe someone. It started with her asking how I would describe E for example, and if using black was “Ok?”

So I was honest and said if I was pointing out E in a photo or something, the easiest describing way would be to say he’s the black guy. And since we’re not in the USA, it seems beyond weird to say he’s African-American. Well what if there are more than one “black guy?” she asked. Well then I’d describe him using any other distinguishing feature ie. clothing items, glasses, hair style etc. The same way I would do with anyone of any skin color.

I personally don’t feel that skin color has anything to do with who a person IS. Yes, it can help identify where they are from, as well as perhaps their race, but ultimately, for me, that is not the deciding factor on WHO someone is. It doesn’t tell me what radio station they prefer or what their political views are. It won’t tell me the hobbies they entertain in their spare time or what kind of books they gravitate towards. Skin tone won’t help me know if they’re a vegetarian or meat eater, nor will it help me know if they are prankster or Mr. Seriousness.

I believe people create themselves. From the time they are born, based on their likes and dislikes we form our own selves. All personal choices we make each day, form us into independent individuals. We use our reactions to certain situations to form thoughts and therefore opinions on everything, and based our next decisions on those. A race, or color is not WHO I am. All my skin does is hold the rest of my body together.

It’s not like skin that comes in different colors should be valued more or less like Gold/Silver/Bronze medals. It shouldn’t even be compared. It shouldn’t automatically place me in a certain category in life, except that the majority of peoples opinions and thoughts and therefore decisions on how we react to certain individuals has somehow along the way placed so much importance on skin tone than necessary.

No longer do people care about intelligence or kindness or even how you tie your shoes. For some reason society today chooses to judge human beings on something equally irrelevant as shoe tying. Which is what color your largest organ is.

Stupid.

As for me, if I were to describe myself, I’d say white or Canadian depending on the way the question is phrased. I wouldn’t feel the need to go into detail about how I’m one quarter Japanese, part Irish…. and it goes on and on. I also don’t have a huge connection to any of the countries my heritage comes from. So I don’t feel the need to protect the culture of… anything. So I would just used the simplest description: Canadian because that’s where I was born, but it’s not all that I am.

Sometimes I feel like African-American/Canadians/Blacks are trying so hard to maintain their individual culture, which has slowly been being invaded by others, that they don’t recognize that by secluding themselves this way, they might be in fact creating a situation that they fought so hard to get out of for too long.

Their ancestors fought so hard to diminish segregation, and the whole idea of keeping certain people classed certain ways because of race/skin color seems a step back to me. I feel that society had reached a point (a very shaky unbalanced place, but we got there) on the ladder towards equality, and now individual races may be working against that. Perhaps even taking a step or two down the ladder.

Case in point, I saw a story about how a large University in the states was holding a separate Graduation Ceremony for it’s black students and for some reason the black student body felt that was great. How? When you’ve been fighting to be seen as equal for so long, how would you see being viewed/celebrated in a separate light as a win? I dunno, to me it just seemed like a step back, that for some reason they were so proud of.

I have no idea the thinking or reasoning behind it, but to segregate a group of students from their classmates based on skin color to celebrate an achievement that they reached together seems like a downgrade. 4+ years of hard work together, studying, partying, growing friendships across cultural boundaries for 4 years, only to be told that come Graduation you’d be celebrating apart because of the color of your skin?

What a pity.

As for myself, yep my skin is white. In the summer it tans and in the winter I look like a pale ghost. But I’m still me. I’m a mother of two who is doing her best to find herself in this confusing world. And in doing so, I will do my best to not judge others over something they have no control over.

Do I judge others? Of course.

If you make a stupid decision or act like a fool, in my head I will judge you. But that’s your life and those are your choices. As for me, based on what I see from you, I will either choose to either associate with you or not based on your CHOICES and DECISIONS. Never on skin tone, or lack thereof. I chose my friends carefully, not because we were born in the same country or even the same neighborhood, but because our thoughts align and we make similar choices and our thought patterns are both close.

I don’t care what color your largest organ is. I’m more concerned about the hypothetical color of your heart.

-Michael Jackson/Black or White-

#HumboldtStrong

A hashtag that has unfortunately cropped up over the past week here in Canada and a few places around the world. For those of you in the dark, it’s a symbol of an accident that happened between a semi truck and a bus carrying a junior hockey team on their way to a game. The result of the crash so far has been 16 deaths, multiple injuries and a huge outpouring of support, both across our nation and worldwide.

As of yesterday, the Go Fund Me page, who’s initial goal was to pay for maybe coffee and parking for the families visiting the hospital, surpassed $11.5 million dollars, making it one of the top 5 Go Fund Me pages ever.

Now I’m very divided on this. (Of course I would have an opinion on it lol). Am I super proud of people rallying around these families in support of their lost loved ones? Obviously! It’s never easy to lose someone unexpectedly. Which brings me to my inner struggle.

Why has this particular accident garnered so much attention? Is it because of the ages of the “victims” *reminder this was not a malicious attack, but a car accident…accident.* Or is it because of the sheer number of lives lost at once? Or is it because they were so seemingly innocent on their way to a sporting event? Was it because so many of us could relate to that experience, driving a child to a game or competition? Was it because NHL teams started donating and showing support, so hey, if they are doing it, it must be big/important?

But lets be honest, is $11.5 MILLION really necessary? I understand medical procedures are expensive, but why? Why can’t doctors “fees” become less expensive? Or hospital stays become cheaper? Why does it cost thousands of dollars to run a scan… any scan? Even more to the point, why are funerals so damn expensive? For real? Not to be crass here, but you are literally either digging a hole in the ground, or burning an empty carcass (I know that’ll offend a bunch of you, but those are just facts). So, I’m honestly wondering why medical bills can be racked up so quickly? Or maybe it’s just because when you’re THAT sick and it’s an emergency situation, hospitals know you’re in no position to go shopping around for the best deal, and can quite literally charge you anything after the fact. Leaving you alive, but slapping you with a huge bill.

On the other end of the spectrum though, is why did so many people turn to support this cause in such a tremendous way, when accidents, or even unfortunately purposeful killings/murders happen all the time? Are those families less deserving of support? Do those loved ones somehow struggle less because their kids didn’t die along side their peers on the way to a game representing our national sport? Are the medical bills somehow reduced or procedures preformed pro bono? Are funerals for those individuals who die in car accidents preformed at a reduced price?

Nope. Not a chance. Death has become a profitable industry.

Everyday people die. Some peacefully in their sleep, and some in more horrific ways then we could ever dare to imagine, and their families are left to deal with that tragedy alone.

Most compelling though, was an article I read today about a small town mayor here in Canada that I had to in some way both admire, and for some reason it kinda pissed me off. He refused to lower the town flag in honor of the individuals who passed away in the Humboldt accident. When questioned about it, he stated basically that the flag was not lowered for the 30 people who died in a mosque shooting nor for the 7 individual who where killed in the gay nightclub killing, and no one questioned that. So why should it be lowered now? What made these deaths more deserving? But then he went on to say that we needed a legislation to state when and for whom the flag should be at half mast for, thus the part that pissed me off.

But he made the point I’ve been trying to say all along. Why should we care more about these boys (and female Physical Trainer) that died, than any other person who is killed in our country? I doubt that was his point, he just wanted to have a set of rules to follow straight across the board, but it’s my point.

Why should more respect, care, help, support etc. be shown to these families, than people in similar situations.

Just because the pain may not be on such a grand scale to the person looking at a fatal accident involving only, say one death in comparison to Humboldt, doesn’t mean that an entire family hasn’t lost a brother, or father, or uncle etc. To them, the pain is just as devastating. In fact, in the case of an “everyday death’ it may be even more so, because on top of their loss, they are now struggling with how to pay for ridiculously expensive medical/funeral costs on top of everything.

It seems messed up to me.

-Red Hot Chili Peppers/Power Of Equality-

Tag: equality

I Told About Equality And It’s True Either You’re Wrong Or You’re Right But, If You’re Thinkin’ About My Baby It don’t Matter If You’re Black Or White