I Got A Notion To Say What Doesn’t Feel Right

As it stands now, I hate Mother's Day. This will be my 7th Mother's Day, and I've yet to enjoy a single one. Yes, I've been a single parent for 3 of them already, coming up on my forth this Sunday, and I'm actually dreading it. When married to E, he never understood the whole … Continue reading I Got A Notion To Say What Doesn’t Feel Right

I Remember All The Feelings And The Day They Stopped

Last summer (2016), after I bought my own house (Yeah me!), I fell back into old habits (Boo me). Like they say, old habits die hard. I hadn't slept with anyone since I had left E almost 2.5 years ago, since I had more important things to focus on, like school and my kids and just adjusting to … Continue reading I Remember All The Feelings And The Day They Stopped

I Don’t Ever Wanna Feel Like I Did That Day, Take Me To The Place I Love, Take Me All The Way

When I was 19, my body was used for the first time in ways that changed me forever. I was really good friends with this one couple, A and M.  We worked together, we went out dancing every weekend together. I was even planning on moving in with A in a few weeks because she … Continue reading I Don’t Ever Wanna Feel Like I Did That Day, Take Me To The Place I Love, Take Me All The Way

Nobody Said It Was Easy. No One Ever Said It Would Be This Hard

I'd like to say that once I got back to Canada things got better fast. But that would be a complete lie. It was hard. There were so many stressful factors I didn't even consider when thinking the whole "leave E" thing through. My parents let us stay with them for which I am so … Continue reading Nobody Said It Was Easy. No One Ever Said It Would Be This Hard

I Mean This Is Exhausting You Know We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together

So today I was back at the airport for the first time since flying back from Kenya 3 years ago. I felt like a deja vue kinda thing happening. I had to head out there for work to meet some of the guys we'd recruited for work and it was just a causal meet and … Continue reading I Mean This Is Exhausting You Know We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together

Tell The World I’m Coming… Home Let The Rain Wash Away All The Pain Of Yesterday

I booked flights for about 10 days out. They were the right combination of cheapest and nearest in date. Well they weren't cheap, but I just wanted to get out of there ASAP. Then, after I booked the flights and paid, I sent an email to my mom letting her know our itinerary and just … Continue reading Tell The World I’m Coming… Home Let The Rain Wash Away All The Pain Of Yesterday

Should I Stay Or Should I Go Now If I Go There Will Be Trouble And If I Stay It Will Be Double

I spent the next couple of days in what can only be described as a fog. I was there. I was alive. But I was definitely not thinking clearly. Everything was blurry. Fuzzy. I couldn't concentrate on any of the mundane day to day things that needed to be done. The kids needed to be … Continue reading Should I Stay Or Should I Go Now If I Go There Will Be Trouble And If I Stay It Will Be Double

The Cat Came Back The Very Next Day The Cat Came Back They Thought He Was A Goner

The drive away from my home and my life was quiet. I was doing my best to stay calm. I had my kids to worry about, and I didn't want them to sense anything was more wrong then what was blatantly obvious... Daddy had just beat up Mommy, and had packed up our things and kicked … Continue reading The Cat Came Back The Very Next Day The Cat Came Back They Thought He Was A Goner

Sunday Morning, Rain Is Falling /Clouds Are Shrouding Us In Moments Unforgettable

It was actually a bright and sunny day in Kakamega. But rain would've been a simpler reason to explain to my 3 year old son why Daddy had changed our plans for the day. It was Sunday morning, Jan 2014, and the night before E and I had decided we would take the kids into … Continue reading Sunday Morning, Rain Is Falling /Clouds Are Shrouding Us In Moments Unforgettable