When You Feel So Tired But You Can’t Sleep Stuck In Reverse

I guess a depression is the simplest way to describe it. But it’s not simple. There are so many layers to it. I’m exhausted. I feel like everything is overwhelming. I use earplugs constantly because just people talking to me is to much stimulation lately. My kids walking on the floor like regular human beings … Continue reading When You Feel So Tired But You Can’t Sleep Stuck In Reverse →

I Never Thought I’d Die Alone Another 6 Months I’ll Be Unknown / I Never Conquered

You know when your feeling sad or depressed and so you turn on sad depressing music to get way in your feelings? That’s where I’m at. Like I said, the doctor doesn’t know how to solve my problems right now, so he’s decided to drug me up. And as we all know from last summer … Continue reading I Never Thought I’d Die Alone Another 6 Months I’ll Be Unknown / I Never Conquered →

Don’t Ever Think That It Can’t Happen To You, You Gotta Stand On Your Own Two Win Or Lose

I got home almost a week ago. Just taking some time to absorb it all and get back into my life. I had really thought I’d be leaving the hospital with answers. Solutions. But no. Instead I have more tests to do. And more questions. The doctors haven’t outright said they are more confused than … Continue reading Don’t Ever Think That It Can’t Happen To You, You Gotta Stand On Your Own Two Win Or Lose →

I Am Chosen Not Forsaken I Am Who You Say I Am You Are For Me Not Against Me

Zero. Zero chance of this thing getting a solution this time around. My neurologist came in this morning with all his groupies to do rounds and had a lot to say. Starting with the fact I do not have a usual case. My electrical activity is coming 24/7 from the right side, like even right … Continue reading I Am Chosen Not Forsaken I Am Who You Say I Am You Are For Me Not Against Me →

Shake, Shake Your Body And The Blood Begins To Boil

4. I had four seizures overnight, and so this is a late post since I’ve spent most of the day sleeping between checkins and reapplying the leads I pulled out etc. I don’t remember the first actual seizure happening but shortly after the nurse came in and I had only been sleeping about 30 minutes … Continue reading Shake, Shake Your Body And The Blood Begins To Boil →

Somehow You’re Always The First To Take Care Of Me At My Worst, You Are Appreciated

24 hours. And they gathered very useful information. Tuesday morning the neurologist walked in with her entourage of interns/nurses/neurologist in training and said my EEG from overnight had been very informative already. The data so far had let them know that my seizures are coming from a part of the brain that isn’t used for … Continue reading Somehow You’re Always The First To Take Care Of Me At My Worst, You Are Appreciated →

If I Showed You My Flaws If I Couldn’t Be Strong If I Got Locked Away

Seizure Investigation Unit. S.I.U. Not quite C.S.I., which was a show I used to watch all the time on Thursday nights with my dad in my early teens. That, and then Survivor, which has a new season coming in March and I totally didn’t expect Erica to win last time around but I’m WAY off … Continue reading If I Showed You My Flaws If I Couldn’t Be Strong If I Got Locked Away →

Through All Of The Chaos I’ll Find A Way Out I Know Home Is Where You Make It

Chaotic. That would be the main word I’d use. Frustrating. Annoying. Not as planned. There is so much out of the ordinary going on that’s out of my hands right now I don’t even have the capacity to pick a single word to explain it. Home. I’m still at home. The hospital started off by … Continue reading Through All Of The Chaos I’ll Find A Way Out I Know Home Is Where You Make It →

I Don’t Wanna Leave This Dream, Don’t Wake Me Cause I Never Seem To Stay Asleep Enough

I got a call. I actually got it before my last call, but because I had been a lazy butt, I had to catch up on Christmas junk before I could tell you this juicy gossip. It’s actually (again) not that juicy, but well let me just write my post and get back on track. … Continue reading I Don’t Wanna Leave This Dream, Don’t Wake Me Cause I Never Seem To Stay Asleep Enough →

Have Yourself A Very Merry Christmas Let Your Heart Be Light

I had the most beautiful Christmas. Yes it was full of stress and sickness, but I think that’s a holiday for single moms everywhere. Do I realize we’re almost halfway into January by now? Obviously 🙄 but I really just took this time to be a lazy butt and nap probably every day and while … Continue reading Have Yourself A Very Merry Christmas Let Your Heart Be Light →