This Is For The Question Marks / Together We Are Dangerous Together With Our Differences

I had a terrible…. ‘thing’ happen Saturday night. I want to say nightmare but I wasn’t sleeping. I wish more than anything right now that it was a dream, but I was wiiiiiiide awake unfortunately. Which makes it all the more terrifying.

To be honest I didn’t realize it was happening until it was over. Because it all felt to real. It’s like to realities merged together in some very scary mind bending alternate universe but at the same time it was in my head. Yet out of my head since it happened to me/with me. Ugh this shits to hard to write to explain. There aren’t words enough to do it justice. It’s like either you feel and experience it or you don’t.

But there I was in the moment and I was understanding someone else’s thoughts. Like I was living the things he was thinking of doing to me. It was horrible and terrible and disgusting and morbid, yet in that moment I couldn’t pull myself out because I didn’t realize it wasn’t this true reality to me in that time. I went from relaxing one moment to experiencing all these feelings and emotions and sensations that were not of me but the guy I was with. And it wasn’t until I was able to find my own thoughts and control my own mind purely, that in one horrible rush, all the energy of his rushed away from me. Like I melted away from myself and the experience zoomed down from my head to my toes and the room melted into the place I had seen when I first walked in. All the things I had been seeing in less than an instant rushed back into his mind and he lay there still. Not a care in the world. Not a clue that I had just seen and experience everything I think he was thinking. Because I KNOW I didn’t make those thoughts on my own.

I was beyond scared. I was immobile. I could hardly breathe. I wanted to cry and scream and melt away into nothing. But as my breath returned and I calmed down, I’ve began to think long and hard about that time. And the seemingly countless others I’ve now come to have in the past with various others. Sure perception probably plays a role in this somehow but today I’m focused on how I experienced his thoughts.

And for me, it boils down to this.

The collective consciousness.

There is no proof that our thoughts are maintained in the brain. Maybe they are produced there, but a thought is not a tangible thing that must be stored within a body as most would assume until now. If I have been able to clear my thoughts and solve the majority of issues I’ve been handed in my life so far to a point that I’ve have no qualms with others. No issues of contention with others thoughts, then it could stand to reason that I would have a clear path in my consciousness that would allow me to easily access the thoughts/consciousness of others.

This, however, has not been enjoyable for me. If you’ve read my blog for a while, like a few years, you know this journey of consciousness has been a long and tough one. I don’t think it’s something that can be achieved overnight. We have years of thoughts built up in this physical lifetime, not to mention however much pain etc may be passed down through DNA and what not. Then on top of that, I now risk exposing myself in times of vulnerability to others minds without meaning or wanting to. Plus, I highly doubt some people want their thoughts that must be on the outer edge of their minds that they’ve hidden in the deepest darkest part away from their centre to be exposed and viewed by others without permission.

In a way, it’s a beautiful thing to consider and hope for and believe in. But… I think in general people would want to start cleaning up their own thoughts before they know they may be experienced by an outsider.

But that’s just my personal opinion. I know I’ll be working on what I think even in the darkest recesses of my mind, in the unknown. On the off chance it may be touching someone else’s mind and affecting them.

I have been working on it. And will continue to with every conscious thought I make.


-Together/Kirk Franklin, Tori Kelly & FOR KING AND COUNTRY-

8 thoughts on “This Is For The Question Marks / Together We Are Dangerous Together With Our Differences

  1. Whether we speak, or simply breathe, every talent in the world co-exists with the one talent, being of love. It all comes natural, that is. Why fight against what comes natural to us? I ask that, because it seems you were terrified in someone understanding you.

    Don’t involve so much complexity in with the attempt from another, to comprehend you. It should be a simple thing to understand someone, because it is fear that divides a person away from that comprehension. Why you were terrified in someone seeing something of themselves, in you, is beyond my understanding.

    Reflection is necessary for empathy’s sake. It is the essence of being human. We are only ever human, of flesh and blood, so we can see beyond the wounds to the possible infection. It is because that infection only ever a grew out of a lack of care.

    When we want to understand someone, we see beyond the surface. Though, that “surface” shouldn’t be so complex to never get past it. As in, it shouldn’t be a brick wall. It should be a cloud to pass through, so that one may see something far more interesting.

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    1. I think what is beyond your understanding, is that I was not afraid in that moment to have my thoughts read but of that fact that I read another individuals thoughts. Not just ‘read’ them, but lived them. I had his thoughts walk through my body and had all his sexual desires lived out in my presence before I had the understanding of what was happening. I believe you would have shit your pants had that happened to you kind sir.

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      1. Oh, I’ve done it, at least once. And, it ended up with a beloved of mine attempting suicide upon herself, 4 times over. She attempted such, after our break-up. My blog is actually dedicated to her. It’s a long story that will rock your socks.

        She attempted it, because I understood her, and for a man to understand a woman, means for him to have actually paid attention to her. So… yes, I lived in her thoughts. I also lived in her heart. I never betrayed her. Though, I lost her, due to the break-up. And, I almost lost her, again, 4 times after that.

        But, it took time. A lot of time, to comprehend what I never understood before, because as a man, all I lived was a lie. A lie of being strong, while the truth to my empty world was just sitting there, somewhere in the ether.

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  2. The first time something like this happens to you, it is quite overwhelming. It’s a conduit though, which has been opened and your ongoing interaction with it will be about modulating the dial, sort of. You’ll be able to get the information while controlling the volume…and in time, the channel. You don’t need to know what everyone standing next to you in line in the store is thinking, so to speak.

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