We Don’t Fit In Well Cause We Are Just Ourselves / You Look Stunning Dear

Z has her first crush and it is adorable. It’s one of Little E’s basketball teammates and friends from school named Tyson. He’s a very friendly boy and when he’s over to play they include Z which she obviously loves. Over the weekend she had told me that she only likes two boys, Little E and Tyson and I said that’s fine you don’t have to like all the boys, as long as you are kind to them. But last night at basketball practice I saw her crush in action for the first time and realized it was more than just an ‘I like him the way I like my brother’

It was a quick water break and Tyson came to grab his water bottle from beside where we were sitting, which I should note that Z had brought for him since he had forgotten it at school, so she made sure to save it for him and brought it full of fresh water to practice. Anyways, Tyson comes to grab a drink and Z says hi Tyson with the slight giggle and smile and all the innocence of a 6 year old girl crushing on a 9 year old boy with me sitting right there. And Tyson being the wonderful kid he is says hi Z and has his drink with a smile. Then she kinda giggles and looks back at me. Then Tyson calls her name again and we both look and he’s making a silly face at her which she loves (oh kids) and he runs back on to the court.

I thought it was the most adorable things ever to see the whole interaction. How sweet and innocent and friendly they both were. Tyson’s a great kid. He’s also the boy who after dinner at our house announced he was excited to go through puberty one day (I can’t remember if I blogged about that or just texted his mom laughing so hard about it) he’s an only child but well rounded and a good friend to Little E and apparently Z too.

I’m looking forward to what this grows into.

When his mom showed up to pick him up for practice we chatted for a bit and I mentioned that Z had a little crush. Her response surprised me. His mom and I have become acquaintances throughout this school year and she’s been over for coffee a couple times but it takes time to really know a person right? So when she said ‘Oh that’s ok, I’d be cool with a little colour in the bloodline’ or something along those lines. I was completely thrown off. She went on about how their pale Scottish skin could use some colour etc but I wasn’t really listening at that point anymore.

I guess it didn’t occur to me that my kids would face this kind of racism in their life. Subtle. But extremely there. Words that don’t need to be said and can be hurtful.

All it is, is a harmless crush between kids. There was no need to bring melanin into it. And to have that be your first reaction must mean it’s near the forefront of your thoughts. As opposed to the innocence and beauty of the relationship forming, your thoughts jumped to colour. I dunno. Not the best foot to put forward in my opinion.

So. I just felt it was the cutest moment on the kids part I wanted to share. And hope that as they grow older they learn healthy ways of interacting with each other. That help each other grow into beautiful human beings. Weather they end up together or not.


-Beautiful People/Ed Sheeran-

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One thought on “We Don’t Fit In Well Cause We Are Just Ourselves / You Look Stunning Dear

  1. Kids are innocent. Adults suck balls. I swear some people really know how to ruin a genuine thing. I’m sorry you face this. In any way shape or form. I don’t have words for what it feels like to bear that weight but speaking from the side of people who put that on others, they suck. And you don’t deserve to have that to deal with in any way. I’m going to stop here because my senstivities have been rattled with your story and it breaks my fucking heart that people are like this in this modern day of acceptance and appreciation for the differences we bring to the plate. And to be so bold and blatant in her obvious “judge a book by its color” type of perspective – Gah – I’m still word vomiting at you.

    I’m so sorry. Please know it hurts me that this type of ugliness is real to humanity. God damn us all for making people feel the way you do. Grr- I’m sorry. I am so insanely moved in a passionate direction by your post. And I’m sorry. I’m considering deleting my post because of how angry it is, but I will post it and leave to you to delete if it is too offensive. I won’t be offended in the slightest. But I’m posting it because I wanted you to know that I stopped by your post, that I took the time to read it, and then I took in how you must feel and it fucking dropped me to the floor of rage that I can barely describe.

    Not at you, but what people must go through for looking different, for being different, for daring to not be the same as “THEY” say you should be. Oh how I could go on, but I don’t want to hurt you or offend you after what she said to you. I just wanted you to know that someone cares. Someone in the world heard your story and is mortally offended. I don’t know if that matters. But your story does to me.

    Lots of love and warmth and appreciation for the wonder you bring to the world. Not because your skin has some color but because of the wonderful rainbow of color your soul expresses. There is nothing more beautiful and pure than what you bring.

    Shame on the hag that showed her ugliness up front thinking you would be okay with it and being so awful to not even realize what horribleness she was putting on display for the world to see. Blugh. *cringe*

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