Got Everybody Watchin’ What I Do Come Walk In My Shoes And See The Way I’m Livin’ If You Really Want To

I have to stop tempting the universe.

Each time I say “I’ve had enough,” it turns around and is like OHHHH but wait there’s more.

You know that stupid saying “The world/God/life/ only give you what you hand handle’? I must be the Queen of the fucking world after all this junk.

So to start off my day (yes, just to start) I was driving to work and trying to get in the right mindset since I spent the morning yelling at my kids to hurry up and get ready.

You’d think after 4-5 months of a morning routine before school, little E would know there’s no time to read books in the morning. I mean I love the fact that he loves to read, but common! Get ready first, then read. Nope instead lately, morning after morning I find him laying on his floor with a book, still in his pajama’s, and then we have to do the hustle and bustle to get out the door on time. I’ve tried taking the book away, but he just picks out a new one. I tried explaining to him about just doing his jobs first then he can relax on the couch until it’s time to go. And now, I’ve resorted to raising my voice/yelling. Which leads to me having to explain my frustrations to him on the ride to daycare. I have to tell him that yes, I did lose my temper and that was my responsibility, but it is his responsibility to do what he has been told (many times) which is get dressed, eat breakfast, get cleaned up, then he can read.

I explained that I’m annoyed that I have to keep telling him something fairly simple over and over, and at a certain point, he needs to take responsibility. Especially since he’s growing older, and I want to be able to trust him with those things, so that as he grows, I can add more things. How I know I can trust him, is when he can do it on his own without being told/reminded. So, I apologized for getting mad, told him I loved him, and we both agreed to work on our faults and not let it ruin our day.

So, anyways back to the drive to work. I dropped the kids off and continued on my way with my music blaring, and like I said, the universe is like oh C, just guess what we have in store for you today, because while I was stopped in traffic dancing like no-one was watching (and even if they were I don’t give an eff) when a car slams into my rear-end and I go flying forward.

Great, hey? Just what I needed. To be rear-ended. So this young kid gets out and I’m trying to figure out what the hell just happened. All my shit is everywhere in my car. Hot coffee splashed everywhere, paperwork all over the floor/dash, like this was not a gentle nudge. And he walks up all nervous and I’m like just relax buddy. It’s not the end of the world. Yeah it sucks balls, but it is what it is, but we can’t go back. Just give me your info and let’s take pictures so I can get to work.

So we exchange information and I head off to work. But since then, my body has been literally vibrating. My neck/back are actually hurting and as ridiculous as this sounds, my knees are actually becoming so sore, I don’t even know how that works. It’s like as I progress throughout my day, everything is becoming more and more stiff and sore.

Anyways, this kid is like 18-19 years old and is having his dad deal with it, which I don’t care really.  I’m just annoyed that now I have to find time to file a police report and deal with this unnecessary junk. I also made myself a chiropractor appointment for after work today because I’m that sore already. I can just imagine what I’ll feel like tomorrow.

So, to top off my day (yep you heard me, that’s not all folks) my appointment that I booked back in like late September to get a prescription for medical marijuana was supposed to be today but shortly after I got to work, they called to cancel it. They said they would re-book me in the “near future” which aggravated me because my wait time from Sept-Jan was a “short wait” according to them.

Now, when I say I’m done. I really mean it. I don’t mean let’s test C some more to see how strong she is. I mean this stopped being fun a long time ago.

This is all I can handle. And no, I don’t want to see if I’m right or wrong on that point.

I’m stating it as fact.

I’m done.

*UPDATE**** I”ve just been informed by a fellow blogger that, yep, I should go get tested for HIV just in case, since sometimes it symptoms can lay dormant for years…. so that’s great.****


-T.I. Feat Rihanna/ Live Your Life-

8 thoughts on “Got Everybody Watchin’ What I Do Come Walk In My Shoes And See The Way I’m Livin’ If You Really Want To

    • I’m here if you wanna chat. I’ve met too many people who are having similar experiences, which is part of why I still write about my day to day life how I do. To let people know as crazy as life seems, we’re not alone, in an unfortunate way 😒

      Liked by 1 person

      • Thank you! I really need it. As dumb as it sounds I need a fucking hug and a shoulder to cry my eyes out on. I need that feeling!
        I know things WILL be ok. But it’s such a hard emotional roller coaster that makes you doubt yourself and put yourself down and makes you feel like your not good enough and your a failure. It’s hard to pick up. And I know I will. I just hate feeling in these moments.

        Like

  1. Oh my my “C”… so sorry to hear that. I’m seriously praying for your health. I just met you (virtually) a few hours ago via “binge-reading” your blog and you have become my FAVORITE blogger already. I don’t want this to end that soon. I want to see this beautiful spirit of yours carried by a very healthy body of yours. Pls. take very good care of you for your loved ones and for readers like me. Pls… pls… pls…

    Liked by 1 person

      • Awesome “C”… You’d be alright. Trust me. You always seem to do it in your life. And that’s not possible without the UNIVERSE looking after you from this close.

        I did not plan to freak you out with so many comments of mine but this accident seriously freaked me out as I had just started liking you, your life, your writing and everything you feel. And BAM! this happened. I have still not stopped praying for your 100% recovery. There are many (including your loved ones) who need you.

        Liked by 1 person

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