I am livid this morning, and even that doesn't accurately describe the level of emotion I'm feeling right now.
Maybe 1 or 2 weeks ago my Mom reposted some ridiculous propaganda on Facebook. I considered linking it here instead of describing it, but I can't be responsible for spreading such misleading and inaccurate information. Normally, for starters I'm not on Facebook, but the odd time I am, I try to ignore what my Mom posts, since she is the queen of reposting, although this one caught my attention and I had to view it.
This apparent 'study' was done on policing in the States and racism within. And basically ended by saying black men are NOT being hurt by police (despite all the overwhelming evidence otherwise) and that if there were no police, black men would only kill each other (despite no evidence to prove that).
I was fucking APPALLED that my own mother ( who bitched at me for no longer going to church, and sleeping with K while still officially being married to E) would spread this around, although at the time I read it, I didn't say anything… until yesterday.
With everything happening in America in Charlottesville, I sent my mom a few links and explained that what she had posted bothered me, and was quite frankly embarrassing that she would spread that around as my mother considering my children are mixed race.
Her basic response?
I cannot believe I came from her.
With everything going on in the world today, I've realized that apparently it is quite easy for racists to exist and for that, I apologize. I continued to tell her that she was just being a sheep for reposting without doing any due diligence, or simple research on the issue, and so if that was too difficult for her to do, I would do it for her. And if she continued to post ignorant racist posts, I would make it my business to follow up and comment the truth. And then proceeded to block her.
Yes she is my mother, yes she will always be my mother, but I have my kids and their futures to be concerned about now. How I turned out the way I am, knowing someone with a thought process such as hers raised me is beyond my mental capacity, but I am so thankful I'm not like her.
I do not, AT ALL, believe that one race (any race) is better than any other. I understand that blacks (and many other races) have suffered a great deal under whites and for that I want to apologize, although even this is a tricky area… do you want our apologies?
I want to support in whatever way is accepted by you. Do you want apologies? How would you like to see our support? Can we use hashtags like #blacklivesmatter? Should we? Or are we better off joining you at rallies but just as quite background support… strength in numbers type thing? Or is it cool for us to be speaking out against it, full force if we have a platform to? What do you as the black community, want to see from the white community who want to support you? Will you allow us to stand with you? Or is it too painful and offensive still?
I'm asking these questions because more than anything I don't want to be ignorant. I would like to be supportive in whatever way you will allow, and require, instead of just barging in and doing what I think is best.
So… please? Do you want us white people to just back off and let you fight your fight? Or would you allow those of us who truly want to stand with you, do so?
I'm honestly wanting to know to understand all your feelings and viewpoints. I just want to steer clear of becoming like my mother.
So please, I'm asking for your input.
Also I'm aware this doesn't make a difference, because racism can exist anywhere unfortunately, but for those of you unfamiliar with me and my story… No I do not live in America. I'm from Canada. But I can definitively say I do not support Trump or most politicians for that matter. At this point I'm quite aware that the majority are placed there for the masses to choose from so they feel like they have a choice, but in reality, all are moulded by central banks and the upper echelons to keep the rich rich and really not many truly care for 'the little person'. But… that's my own 'humble' opinion. To each their own.
-Black Eyed Peas/Where Is The Love-